Don't worry I haven't had another run in with the neighbours over the work going on (although that wouldn't be a surprise as the hammering and banging continues and we'll be into month nine next week). No, it's a reference to a line spoken by an actor in ITV's ghostly drama Lightfields the other day.
"He called us scum???" I said to Marion puzzled by this out of character line from a 1940's farmer's wife. "His call up's come!!!!" Marion explained. And that's when the extent of my hearing loss hammered home.
It's been going on for some years now. I had a problem with a jet of hot water into one ear in the shower about fifteen years ago which left my ears ringing ever since and I've struggled to hold conversations in noisy venues for a few years and simply blamed the sound levels in the pub or restaurant rather than myself. I've found myself asking shop assistants to repeat themselves and merrily driven up the motorway oblivious to the clicking of the indicator until I've noticed the light flashing (I still can't believe that it clicks but passengers assure me that it does).
When friends Dave and Jane visited us in Scotland a couple of weeks ago Jane asked me to turn the TV down - I could barely hear it. I put that down to Jane's perfect hearing but I have to face the truth now. I'm a bit deaf (or maybe even a lot deaf) and I've put off seeing anyone about it for way too long. I suppose that, along with haemorrhoids and failing eyesight it comes with the territory of retirement and is a reminder of one's mortality.
There's a much acclaimed private hearing centre in the area so I'm booked in for an appointment soon. I suppose there's an element of pride and vanity that's prevented me going before. One tends to associate deafness with doddery old age and wearing a hearing aid to be equivalent to wearing a pair of comfortable slacks and a tweed jacket and taking up crown green bowling. But I've checked out the website and there are some hearing aids today that are all but invisible. Fingers crossed they'll sort me out with one of those.
Have a Happy Easter.